Self-esteem is a fundamental aspect of a person's mental health and emotional well-being. It affects the way we relate to ourselves and others, as well as our ability to cope with the challenges of everyday life. When someone has low self-esteem, they may exhibit certain behaviors and attitudes that are telltale signs of this underlying problem. Recognizing someone with low self-esteem can be the first step in providing them with the support and help they need to improve their self-image and quality of life.

1. Lack of self-confidence

One of the most obvious signs of low self-esteem is a lack of self-confidence. People with low self-esteem tend to doubt their abilities and abilities, and often underestimate themselves. They may be afraid to make decisions, express their opinions, or face new challenges, due to a deep-seated belief that they are not good or capable enough. This lack of confidence can manifest itself in indecision, excessive shyness, avoidance of social or work situations, and a pessimistic attitude towards the future.

How to identify a lack of self-confidence?

Some indicators of lack of self-confidence include:

  • Avoiding taking the initiative in group or work situations.
  • Not believing in one's own abilities. and achievements, attributing success to luck or external factors.
  • Being overly critical of oneself, even in the smallest achievements.
  • Constantly seeking approval and validation from others.

2. Excessive self-demand

Another common sign of low self-esteem is excessive self-demand. People with low self-esteem often set unattainable standards of perfection for themselves and are extremely critical of themselves when they fail to meet them. They may feel constantly dissatisfied with their achievements, no matter how significant, and have difficulty accepting their mistakes and limitations. This excessive self-demand can generate a cycle of negative self-criticism that affects your self-esteem and emotional well-being.

How to identify excessive self-demand?

Some signs of excessive self-demand include:

  • Excessive perfectionism, never feeling satisfied with one's own performance.
  • Self-evaluation based on unrealistic standards or comparisons with others.
  • Fear of failure and avoidance of challenges that involve risks or possible mistakes.
  • Punish yourself for making mistakes, without allowing yourself self-pity or forgiveness.

3. Constant need for external validation

People with low self-esteem often excessively seek validation and approval from others to feel valuable and accepted. They may feel insecure about their self-worth and rely heavily on the opinion and judgment of others to feel good about themselves. This constant need for external validation can lead to emotional vulnerability to criticism or rejection, and a lack of autonomy in the construction of one's self-image.

How to identify the constant need for external validation?

Some behaviors that denote a constant need for external validation are:

  • Depend on praise and compliments to feel valuable.
  • Avoid expressing one's own opinions that differ from those of others.
  • Modify one's own behavior or personality to fit the expectations of others.
  • Feel anxiety or discomfort when faced with criticism or disapproval from others.

4. Difficulty establishing personal boundaries

Another characteristic of low self-esteem is difficulty establishing and maintaining healthy personal boundaries in interpersonal relationships. People with low self-esteem may have difficulty saying "no" to others, even when they feel overwhelmed or uncomfortable by others' requests or demands. They may allow others to take advantage of them, avoiding confrontations or conflicts for fear of rejection or disapproval.

How to identify difficulty establishing personal boundaries?

Some signs of difficulty to establish personal boundaries include:

  • Feeling anxiety or guilt when saying "no" to others.
  • Giving in easily to the demands of others, even when they contradict your own needs or values.
  • Feeling unable to express discomfort or disagreement in an interpersonal relationship.
  • Experiencing an imbalance in relationships, with a predisposition to give more than what is received .

Recognizing someone with low self-esteem can be the first step in providing them with the support and attention they need to improve their self-image and emotional well-being. Being attentive to signs of lack of self-confidence, excessive self-demand, constant need for external validation, and difficulty establishing personal boundaries can help you identify people who could benefit from additional emotional support and relevant psychological intervention.