Shame is a complex and universal emotion that we all experience at some point in our lives. It arises when we perceive that we have failed social or personal standards, and is closely related to aspects such as self-esteem, personal image and social acceptance. Learning to manage shame in a healthy way is essential for our emotional and psychological well-being.

The nature of shame

Before addressing How to manage shame, it is important to understand its nature and origin. Shame is a primary emotion that all human beings experience at some point in their lives, and it plays a crucial role in our social evolution. It is related to the feeling of being judged by others and not meeting expectations, which can lead to feelings of inferiority and self-rejection.

Shame can be divided into two types: toxic shame and shame adaptive. Toxic shame is shame that paralyzes us, makes us feel unworthy and inadequate, and can have a negative impact on our self-esteem and emotional well-being. On the other hand, adaptive shame is a healthy response that helps us learn from our mistakes, correct our behavior, and improve as individuals.

Shame Triggers

Triggers Shame levels can vary widely from person to person, as they are influenced by factors such as culture, education, past experiences, and self-perception. Some common situations that can trigger feelings of shame include:

  • Making a mistake in public
  • Being rejected by someone we value
  • Comparing ourselves negatively to others. others
  • Being embarrassed or humiliated in a social situation

It is important to identify personal triggers for shame in order to address them effectively and learn to manage this emotion effectively. healthy.

Structure of the mind and shame

To understand how to manage shame, it is useful to explore the structure of the mind and its relationship with this emotion. The psychoanalytic theory proposed by Sigmund Freud distinguishes between three instances of the mind: the id, the ego and the superego.